I figured today would be a great day to share a song I've had in my
favorites list for the last week. It's called "Fail Us Not" from the band 1000 Generations
. It's a song that simply talks about God never failing us, but I think it sums up nicely where I'm at today and what today represents to me.
Today is a day that represents the end of the beginning. A landmark. Today marks exactly one year to the date that I was wrongfully fired from my last job. I've spoken of the circumstances surrounding the event multiple times through this blog. The fact that it's been a year and I'm still standing is a reason to celebrate.
Today marks one full year that my wife and I have been completely and utterly relying on God to bring through provision and finances. Despite our incredible financial situation - God has provided $1700 of bills each
month with only $1080 in income - He has been faithful. We haven't run late on a single bill - or credit card minimum - since day one of this journey. I like to illustrate our situation by saying it feels like crossing from one ledge to another over a massive chasm. We've been mid-air this whole time, with nothing under us but God.
No safety nets.
No escape hatch.
No Plan B.
I don't want anyone to be mistaken. We didn't embark on this journey in blind faith. We were called to this walk and because of that, God has never forsaken us. Not once. Not ever.Nor will He.
Finances aren't the only miracles we've seen. We've seen healthy boundaries erect between us and certain family members. We've been given the strength and the grace to say goodbye to certain friends that just weren't healthy for us. We've even seen some people who were against this journey in the beginning who have looked at our testimony now and just been left in wonder. Just lately my editor went in for a double mastectomy along with having some of her lymph nodes removed because of breast cancer. But when they ran the tests on the lymph nodes, they found no cancer in the nodes themselves, even though earlier they had run a PET scan and found there to be hot spots in those same nodes that were removed.
I have been amazed on more than one occasion on this walk.
So where are we now in this incredible adventure? What's next? I can't really say. Not because it's a big secret, but because I honestly don't know. I feel like I'm in a waiting place, a limbo - like God is finishing up preparations on whatever it is He's about to roll out. Or maybe there's still a few lessons I need to learn before moving on to the next level.
After receiving counsel from those close to us, I know for a fact that we are still on the right path. That's becoming more and more obvious to me. And if we're on the right path, and if God did make the promises we believe He made so long ago, then it means we will inevitably end up where God promised we'd end up.
The trick is to keep holding on. To look with faith to the destination we have had on our hearts, even though our circumstances hold no indication that we're anywhere near reaching our dreams. But a walk of faith is just that, right? Walking in the unseen, not the seen. If I were to use the circumstances around me as any indication of what God has in store for us, I'd be sorely mistaken. Our cars are falling apart, our finances are slim to none, and we're just a bit worn out from this journey.
But I know that my God is faithful and He will come through when the timing is right. When the timing is perfect.
I have a strange feeling He might just bring about the breakthrough we need when I'm least expecting it...